To My Son’s Teachers

As the final days of middle school wind down I really wish I could share these words with my son’s teachers.
To my son’s teachers,
I’m sorry for the extra work my son being in your class has caused. I’ve seen the looks, heard the heavy sighs and ever seen the hand written post-it notes laced with resentment. I am sure you feel his medical “diagnosis” is used as a crutch. And I know his comments and attempts at being a class clown are often exhausting.
But there’s so much more I wish you could see. First, I wish you could see how seriously we take consequences in our house. Yes, I know you think he’s getting away with everything because he still gets to play sports. But trust me, your day would be harder if he didn’t have that outlet. But besides sports he has spent the better part of 2 years without any privileges that the rest of your students enjoy. Because of this I wish you could appreciate how far we’ve come in the last 2 years. I wish you could see that smart mouth, full sized man you see as an inconvenience is really a generous kid with a tender heart. A child in a man’s body who jumps at the chance to play at the McDs play-land with his friends. A kid who will, and has, literally given his friends the shirt off his back so they can be warm in the freezing rain. A gentle kid who takes great joy in rocking his baby cousins til they fall asleep in his arms. A supportive teammate who feels the loss not only to the team when a member is injured but empathizes with the the player and their loss of time playing the game they love. And who quickly thinks of a small way he can make an effort to make that player field better. I wish you saw the moment his heart broke for a friend diagnosed with cancer and how quickly he began thinking of ways we could raise money to help his family. Or when he climbs into the car after a hard fought basketball game and asks if I think my mom, his grandmother and best friend for the first six years of his life, would be proud of him.
Like I said, I know that tough guy attitude can be obnoxious, but I wish you were able to understand that the inappropriately timed jokes are a defense mechanism built to protect a fragile heart that has endured far too much heart break for his years.
Signed,
A mom trying her best
PS To those select special teachers who have taken the time to see it all, please know you are so very appreciated and have made the tough days, weeks and months just a little easier and for that I will always be grateful.

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